A teeny, tiny step of faith

Have you ever been at a crossroad in life, not sure of which way to go, but knowing that once you started down a path, there would be no turning back?  That's how it was for us when we were on the cusp of making the decision to adopt or not.  Funny how God always seems to know when you need a nudge... I had happened to be on Alex's facebook page (which is always more interesting than mine since I don't know how to upload pictures onto it and I never think anything going on in my life is worthwhile to post) and I saw a post from one of his friends from high school who was adopting a little girl from China.  This would be their second adoption from China and they couldn't be happier.  Julia, his friend's wife, had a blog chronicling their journey and the adoption process and I covertly read everything she wrote.  I was lost among the abbreviations; PA, LOI, HS, DTC, LID, LOA, TA, etc. but I found myself wanting to know more.  I did an online search for "how to adopt" and was overwhelmed with the multitude of websites and the ambiguity of how to actually get started.  What I needed was an "Adoption for Dummies" book but unfortunately it seemed like I was the only Dummy needing such a thing.  So I took a deep breath and emailed Julia - out of the blue, using Alex's facebook account (figuring she wouldn't know who I was otherwise since I had not seen/spoken to her for over a decade) and asked rudimentary questions about adoption and the ultimate question - were you afraid you might not love your adopted child as much as your biological children (she has 3 biological kids so she knew exactly how I felt).  Without her reassurance and honesty, I don't think I would have taken the next step.  But thanks to Julia, and Pastor Frank and Hannah  from our church who also adopted a little girl from China, we saw true examples of how wonderful adoption could be and we started to think that maybe, just maybe, we could take that first teeny, tiny step.